So last week, I climbed into a new decade numerically. I now qualify for senior citizen discounts much easier. The week was pretty difficult emotionallly. I was no longer in my 50’s and Dad can be considered easily be called Grand-Dad if the situation happened (not looking forward to that.
I was reflecting and thinking, how did I get here? It seemed like only yesterday that I was graduating from college and suddenly I realized, that was almost 40 years ago! That was a sobering thought . On the whole the past few weeks have ben really wonderful. A week before I turned 60, I also celebrated my 25th anniversery at my current employer. To me that was a bigger accomplishment. Somthing that I never in my life I would achieve .
I think for me last week was special because of a few things:
- I experienced a real surprise birthday party, orchestrated by my daughter and my girl friend. I was clueless to the planning and I walked in to the party, and the people (My lifelong friends) that have had the most influence in my life were there. To say this was overwhelming would be an understatement! It’s not easy to keep secrets from me but these two young ladies threw out diversions (oh it’s just a dinner with the two of us, I hope you are doing something special for your self Dad, etc.)
- In my life I can count on 6 fingers the friends that have been truly been there for every decade of my existence. To see these people celebrate with me, the passage into my next chapter, was so moving. It just melted my cynical/sarcastic heart!
In retrospect of the last decade for me, I learned a lot about myself:
- I learned that taking things for granted, will only cause you heartbreak when everything falls apart
- Appreciate what you have and always move forward and look to the future. You should always understand your past, but if you dwell on what has happened, you can never live for today and tomorrow.
- Over the past decade: I survived divorce (there is so much pain and healing here), multiple medical issues, and came out of with a new sense of identity. I call this version 2.0 of me. The new version of me is learning to step outside my comfort zone and take risks. Accepting your past and not repeating the same mistakes is key. I made plenty of mistakes in the past decade, but I still came out of with a new found sense of identity and self awareness that I really didn’t think I had when I turned 50.
- My sense of humor survived. I learned to laugh at myself for the mistakes and detours I consistently had to make!
- On-line dating in your 50’s is very difficult. Not to say, that it’s any easier in your 20’s, 30’s and 40’s. This I gathered from informal polls of my friends and family.
What does the future hold for me? I really don’t know. I do know that ageing gracefully and understanding that the future can only be as bright and positive as I make it out to be.
I hope to be around when I turn the clock to the next decade, and I’ll look back on this post and ask.. where did he decade go?